This is the seventh review of the sport parent code of conduct that many parents have signed in order for their child to participate in little league baseball. At Chad Moeller Baseball – we are looking at this document in a deeper reflection with the hope that we can help explain the importance of this conduct code.
The code of conduct includes 17 elements that parents must agree to before signing the document. Number 11 and 12 on the list state:
“11. I will praise my child for competing fairly and trying hard, and make my child feel like a winner every time.”
I encourage every parent and athlete to find at least one aspect of every game to praise their child or teammate. Winning and losing will occur but every kid can learn something every time that they step on the field and we must allow our child to take something positive away from the game.
For example,
“I loved how you patted your teammate on the back after they struck out.”
“I loved how you kept your head held high after the game when you congratulated the other team.”
“I loved watching you compete while you were out there today.”
When a child feels like they have failed – rarely does it happen because of a lack of trying. But if the feeling of failing is compounded by the fear of what their parents will say after the game then the situation becomes bigger that what it needs to be.
Number 12 on the list states
“12. I will never ridicule or yell at my child or other participants for making a mistake or losing a competition.”
During my many years of coaching or participating – I have noticed that the kid who handles failure the worst are the kids whose parents handle failure or negative situations the worst. Not always – but often.
When I see a kid crying in the dugout because of a situation – it usually (not always) comes as a result of the pressure or words coming from the parents.
All parents want what is best for their kids but how we go about it matters.
We as parents have been through much more failure than our children and we intellectually know how to react. But a child is much more emotional because they do not have backlog of memories to rely on.
Rarely do children try and mess up. Rarely do they try and not succeed. Ridicule or yelling in the heat of the moment will not help this situation.
Let the moment be digested – take a deep breath and let the situation breathe before we say something that we regret and your child remembers and stores in their memories forever.
Until Next Time,
Chad